Kyle J. Howard has taken to social media, explaining that he only listens to worship music from people he personally knows and trusts, on account of how triggering and traumatizing it is, and that he finds ‘white evangelical worship’ and ‘reformed worship’ to be the worst offenders and especially problematic.
This new revelation is thoroughly unsurprising, as Howard over the years has described in uncomfortable detail how much spiritual trauma he has been traumatized with while being traumatized by anti-trauma experts who racially traumatized him by leaving him even more traumatized than the last time he was being spiritually and racially traumatized.
Howard reveals how he can 100% do without ‘psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs’ and usually only reads the lyrics- because they aren’t being sung by someone he personally knows and trusts.
He describes worship music in church as very triggering and that it’s one of the reasons people don’t attend church. He reasons that if they went to a church where they were spiritually abused, then they’ve come to associate songs like ‘In Christ Alone’ or ‘Amazing Grace’ that may have been sung there with spiritual abuse, making it impossible for them to sing or even be around people who are singing those songs.
Even instrumental music without lyrics can be traumatic for some, as it brings them back to the spiritual abuse they endured at the hands of the church. In perpetual PTSD, Howard explains that if he listens to music, it’ll only be from ‘pre-conversion era music or artists.’
Of course, because it’s Howard, you knew the had to be a racial component to it.
As far as what can be done, Howards notes that white Christian worship is anchored in celebration rather than lament and that people ought to consider more lamentable black worship.
Furthermore, he says that pastors need to “cultivate an environment where it’s “okay” for a member to come after worship time” and that people should not be shamed or judged for not wanting to join with the church in corporate worship, but rather encouraged to miss the first half of the service if listening to their Christian brothers and sisters worship Christ is to triggering for them.
Howard has previously stated that black people ought to consider leaving their church and finding one where “black worship” is sung in order to alleviate the suffering and trauma that stems from the white worship experience.