Charismatic Prophetess Gives Oddly Specific Information About Dead Children’s Housing Situation in Heaven

When Kat Kerr, our favorite pink-haired charismatic meme-bot and “Dr. Michael Brown-approved prophetess” isn’t weaving an unbiblical tale of witchcraft and false theology by claiming that when babies die in miscarriage, sometimes God “puts them back” in the womb, or that she has a picture of thousands of lioned-faced angels frog-marching chained demons across the sky in order to go to heaven for judgment, she’s explaining that when children die, sometimes they have to stay in the mansions of their distant relatives until their own parents take custody of them.

Speaking to chief-enabler and gullibility king Steve Shultz on Episode 26 of “Wednesdays with Kat and Steve,” the two take some time to sort out the living arrangements in heaven of children that pass away.

Kerr explains that occasionally if a person is about to die, their angels will somehow rip their souls out of their bodies beforehand, effectively killing them so they don’t have to suffer (more on that in Saturday’s post).

She further explains that as soon as people die, they are unconcerned about what happens to their loved ones on earth, because they are ready to go to their mansions which begin to be built in heaven the minute the Holy Spirit “attaches” a person’s spirit to the body at conception. That’s when the construction process on the mansion begins.

Now when children pass that’s different. They live with grandparents already in heaven or great-grandparents in heaven. They usually will raise up those children until their parents get there, but for whatever reason God had already had a plan of who would raise them, because he knew that they would be great in the kingdom.

Shultz asks when will they leave their grandparent’s mansion and go live on their own, and Kat does not disappoint, explaining that sometimes God will keep children the same age until their parents die so that the parents will get the chance to raise them into adulthood in heaven.

If the child is young, or let’s just say it’s a baby, it still eventually will get its own mansion. Everyone comes home (unintelligible) no matter what their natural age was on the earth, but most of the time the mothers want to raise their children. And if they want to raise their children in heaven, then (God) will keep that child young. Sometimes the very age they were when they left the earth.

…But eventually, the child gets to a timeless age where they will have their own mansion, probably near where their parent’s mansions is, and so God has a good plan for all of us. Some people see their children as babies. If they see them as babies they’ll be babies when they get there. Sometimes people see their child as a young teenager or something like that when they get to heaven, that’s the age they’ll be.

Shultz asks a perfectly reasonable question: How will the parents raise their baby in heaven if both have their own mansions and live apart?

You’ll be right next door to each other. Your mansions will probably, your properties will probably be very next to each other. You know, people still do things as family groups, they remember who their parents are…

There are some mansions where the families were so close that there’s this massive piece of property where all the properties join, but they have a way where they walk down the hallways and all come to an area where they’re all together. They can eat together, celebrate, and have events together.

And so sometimes it’s like that if a family was really close, but no one’s gonna feel alone. They’ll spend time with the one who was their dad, with their mom, and sometimes they’ll go on groups together and do things together like picnics together. People love picnics in heaven! The ants are invited but they eat their own food.”


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3 thoughts on “Charismatic Prophetess Gives Oddly Specific Information About Dead Children’s Housing Situation in Heaven

  1. It’s not the fact that Kat Kerr is either an utter liar or is mentally ill that worries me. It’s the fact that some people actually believe her blasphemous nonsense.
    I wonder if she’s decided to see how outrageous she can be before gullible idiots like Steven Schultz start to question her.
    Keep going, Krazee Kat – remember the saying that you can fool some of the people all of the time!

  2. I’m still trying to decide whether I should loathe this pathetic woman for taking the Lord’s Holy Name in vain for financial gain and notoriety, or pity her for suffering severe, delusional mental illness. I’m leaning toward the former…

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