I also think Karen Swallow Prior is a Witch – But a Real One

Karen Swallow Prior and her army of angry Marxists are in a Twitter riot over a young apologist calling her a Witch. I concur with him.

The conversation started at the G3 Conference in 2017, between myself and the guys at Bible Thumping Wingnut, with a few comments from the Grace to You booth next to us. Rosaria Butterfield had just come over to the table and screamed at me for being mean to “her good friend,” Karen Swallow Prior, while I remained calm and cordial.

Darlene Johnson, who took a photo of the incident, told me that Butterfield would surely go to Josh Buice, the conference organizer, and lie to him that I screamed at her. And sure enough, that’s exactly what Butterfield did with her passive, beta-male husband in tow like a lost puppy. Thankfully, the witnesses all explained that it was Butterfield who came out of nowhere, screaming and shaking like a mad woman, pointing her finger into my chest on account of my treatment of Prior.

Our article exposing Prior as a radical feminist, animal rights activist, and gay-affirming liberal had recently been published. Prior was then a no-name non-celebrity, an easily over-looked research fellow for the ERLC with only a few hundred followers on Twitter. Apparently, the incontrovertible facts we published about Prior turned Butterfield into a raging, out-of-control, and hysterical woman.

Butterfield went on to mention me in her talk at G3 that day, which Buice promised he would cut out of the footage (I never followed-up to see if he did or not). Buice also apologized to me for having momentarily believed Butterfield’s lies.

Discussing the incident which left us all slack-jawed in disbelief, I turned to Tim Hurd and said, “I’m going to be honest. I think Karen Swallow Prior is a witch.”

Like, a real witch?” Tim asked.

Yes. A real witch,” I responded.

Amazingly, several prominent evangelicals standing around nodded their head. They concurred. Although nobody claimed omniscience, there’s just something about Prior that seems…off…in a bad way.

SHOULD HE NOT HAVE SAID THAT?

A young Social Justice Contra (those who oppose Social Religion and embrace the Gospel) named Jacob Brunton tweeted the following…


The last few days on Twitter, so I’ve been told, is replete with young gay men, young Beta Males that look like gay men, and hairy-pitted feminists demanding that Brunton be placed under church discipline or expunged by the Technocrat gods from the Internet.

The context, as one can see above, is that this God-hating Social Religionist effectively called those of us who are pro-Gospel racists. Unsurprisingly, Prior chimed in with the closest thing to an “amen” you can get from someone who is living as a subversive agent underground in a Christian seminary.

Brunton called her a witch and the rest is history. Then Danny Akin chimed in…

I do not know if Brunton meant “unpleasant and evil woman” or actual witch.

YES, AN ACTUAL WITCH

Since that time, I have said that I believe Prior is an actual witch at increasingly loud volumes. Whispering it only at first, I found that almost every person I explained my hypothesis to concurred that they also have secretly believed she is a witch but thought they were the only one and afraid to say it out loud.

I’ve made the comment, that I believe she is a witch, in closed forums mostly. I’ve said it in our closed Facebook groups, behind the pay-wall content to our patrons, and so on, afraid of pushback, but I never got it. Most who have followed her rocketship rise from an unknown book nerd at Liberty University to the most prominent professor at Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary has the same suspicion. And while I feel emboldened by nearly universal agreement among those watching Prior from afar, this is the first time I’ve said it so publicly.

Yes, I believe she’s an actual witch.

GUFFAWING ASIDE, WITCHES ARE A THING

I can only imagine the guffawing and chortling from the Socinian branch of evangelicalism, those who also have a hard time believing God made the world in six days (looking at you, Tim Keller) or that he came into the world by a virgin birth. The snickering and eye-rolling from the stuffy intellectuals, with their pinkies stuck to the corner of their mouths, must surely be a sight.

I can hear them now, “Aren’t fundamentalists embarrassing? Oh, how embarrassing. This type of primitive thinking really gives Christians a bad name.”

Of course, I’m an arch-cessationist and have debated against Charismaticism fervently in moderated, professional formats. I certainly have repudiated any inkling of superstition, as is common among the charismatics. My publications have attacked the silly notions of Charismania including Sneak Squid Spirits, Jezebel Spirits, Leviathan Spirits, and so on. These are, of course, just the outpouring of the fanciful imaginations from those who are utterly disinterested with the Bible.

It’s here that someone might ask if I believe in the type of witch that is a hideously ugly, post-menopausal woman with bizarre wardrobe choices and a penchant for cackling. And while I just described Karen Swallow Prior, no that is not my understanding of a witch. We also believe in the devil, despite not thinking he has a pitchfork and tail.

A few weeks ago, my children were trying to comfort one of their siblings, a little girl of 9, who was scared of the dark. They said, “Ask dad, are vampires real?”

No, children.

“Are werewolves real.”

No, children.

“Are boogeymen real?”

No, children.

“Are witches real?”

Yes, children.

I went on to explain that most people claiming to be “witches” are fat girls in Goth makeup who suffer low self-esteem. But there are indeed real witches, for the Bible tells me so. My belief in the existence of witches comes from the Holy Bible (for those who practice Social Religion, that’s the book with the leather cover and the red ribbon bookmarks tied to the spine).

The Bible uses the term “sorceress” to describe them in Exodus 22, “You shall not permit a sorceress to live.” The term in Hebrew is כָּשַׁף (kashaph) and means, “one who whispers spells.”

This term is used repeatedly in the Old Testament and condemned, including in Deuteronomy 8:9-18, 2 Chronicles 33:6, Micah 5:12, and so on.

In Revelation 21:8 the Bible says, “But as for the cowardly, the faithless, the detestable, as for murderers, the sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars, their portion will be in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur, which is the second death.” The term in Greek is φαρμακεύς (pharmakeus) and refers to someone who mixes magic elixirs to cast spells (it is where we get the word “pharmacy” but clearly medical drugs is not what is in view here).

Galatians 5:19-21 also puts sorcery into the list of sins that designate spiritual lostness and forbode eternal destruction, meaning that the sin of witchcraft was upon the minds of at least two different Apostles (John and Paul).

But a third Biblical author – Luke – also records witchcraft in his accounts, Acts of the Apostles. Elymus (Acts 13) and Simon (Acts 8:9-24) both practiced sorcery. Simon apparently thought he could mind-meld the Apostles, making them an offer they couldn’t refuse in order to be granted spiritual authority. It did not work out well for Simon.

Along with the Witch of Endor (1 Samuel 28), who appeared to have demonstrated very real power, the Bible does not refer to these as “supposed witches” or “quote-unquote sorcerers.” In all of the passages in the Bible that deal with sorcery or witchcraft, not one dismisses the dark arts as imaginary or parlor trickery. In fact, the Bible portrays these dark artists as having genuine spiritual prowess.

I’m sure that’s unseemly for Socinians, but despite being a Cessationist I am also a Supernaturalist. I believe supernatural stuff (chiefly that God became man, took on flesh, died a propitiatory death, and rose again from the dead). Therefore, believing in witches is hardly controversial.

Nonetheless, I’m sure some laugh at the notion of witchcraft being real…whenever they get done laughing at a literal global flood, the incarnation of Christ, and a bodily resurrection.

THE SIMPLIST REASON FOR KAREN SWALLOW PRIOR’S INFLUENCE IS THAT SHE IS A WITCH, THEREFORE IT IS THE MOST LIKELY

Occam’s Razor is a problem solving principle attributed to William of Ockham, a Franciscan Friar and expert in logic. Occam’s Razor says that “the simplist explanation is usually the right one.”

Consider this for a moment…

A woman with no personal charisma, a face that scares children, a voice that sounds like nails down a chalkboard, and with a degree in English literature, has gone from being a professor in Shakespeare at Liberty University to a seminary professor at Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary, despite not having any degree or even the vaguest understanding of theology.

This woman was appointed by the Animal Liberation Front in 2007 to “infiltrate” evangelical circles to convince them to become animal rights activists. She has said that dogfighting makes her more upset than abortion. She has said that it’s better people go hungry than that chickens are raised in cages. She wrote that “abortion is not murder” in Christianity Today and begged Christians to be nicer to abortion workers, saying that calling them murderers is “unchristlike.”

The woman uses gay-affirming language, has (and always has had) an immense and passionate following of young gay men, and has spoken at LGBTQ fundraisers. She said a pro-gay “It Gets Better Campaign” was something Christians should get behind. Numerous gay men credit her with helping them “come out” to their families and speak of her support for their sodomy. She promoted gay porn propaganda being used in universities.

Her use of the English language is atrocious and she cannot write an article without having to issue endless retractions or “clarifications” about what she “really meant” (this is the consequence of having to speak out of both sides of her mouth). Furthermore, she is an extremely unpleasant woman, throwing elbows and jabs on Twitter like a brawler or a 60s-era lesbian trying to prove her manliness. She is pugnacious, unladylike, and uglier on the inside than she is on the outside.

Again and again, this woman has proven herself ignorant of even basic and rudimentary Christian doctrines, having the theological acumen of a seventh-grade United Methodist child. And yet…she is the most prominent…and celebrated…professor at a once-conservative Southern Baptist seminary despite not being seminary educated, not being theologically knowledgable, and despite being a radical animal rights activist, hardcore feminist, and unashamed leftist-progressive who preaches that abortion is *not* murder.

None of this adds up. None of it. Karen Swallow Prior being a professor at SEBTS makes as much sense as Joel Osteen being on faculty. And that Prior would be heralded with some kind of “insight” as a talking-head expert in evangelicalism is truly inexplicable. She’s a Shakespeare professor who used her job at Liberty University to help gay kids self-actualize their gayness.

Even looking side-eyed at Prior momentarily will reveal who adores her the most. She has a faithful gaggle of homosexuals, extreme left-wing political followers, Social Religionists, and Marxists forming the core of her fan base. And yet, her supporters include Danny Akin, Albert Mohler, Russell Moore, and the gay parade over at The Gospel Coalition, led by homosexual priest, Sam Allberry.

Supernaturality is the simplist explanation for her rise to stardom. And by supernaturality I mean, she’s a witch.

THE CURIOUS CASE OF TOM BUCK

You know Tom Buck as a faithful conservative, complementarian, and anti-social religion thought leader. That’s how I knew Tom also, back when he was a contributor at Pulpit & Pen. I was taken aback at Tom’s intimate knowledge of the SBC and his acumen to grasp complicated ideological issues. And other than sharing a hotel room with him and discovering he’s the loudest snorer on Planet Earth, I had no complaints with him.

Tom Buck brought us the dossier on Karen Swallow Prior (along with the late Ken Fryer), highlighting her unbelievably brash and open liberalism. At the time, we knew nothing of Prior except her appointment at the ERLC. At that time, virtually no one knew of Prior. We were – all of us – genuinely perplexed that someone whose life was a blinking billboard for liberalism could be appointed by Russell Moore at the ERLC, even when Moore’s own liberalism was taken into account. Her appointment, for us, was surreal.

In fact, except for the time Danny Akin did a video promo for an anti-Christian atheist organization, Openly Secular (which he said he agreed to because they asked politely), I’ve never seen anything so bizarre in Southern Baptist life as the appointment of a gay-affirming feminist and animal rights activist to the ERLC. That seems now like lightyears ago.

But the Tom Buck I knew and dearly loved and trusted, happened to have a phone call with Karen Swallow Prior over the article. And suddenly, with no warning or explanation, Tom Buck not only fully embraced Karen Swallow Prior and repudiated all of the evidence that he himself brought to us, he turned around and repudiated Pulpit & Pen over the incident. Buck then led several of our contributors (namely Landon Chapman and Kofi Adu Boahen) to break ranks and side with…unbelievably…Karen Swallow Prior.

I told the other contributors that I believed Buck had been bewitched, a term that Paul uses in regard to the Galatian Christians in Galatians 3:1. There is no other explanation for why a single phone call could make someone right about so much be so embarrassingly and foolishly wrong at the snap of Prior’s fingers. I thought then – and still think – she put a hex on him (note: the Bible calls these “curses” and uses the term more than 200 times, with at least 22 times referring to humans placing curses on one another).

Thankfully, Prior’s spell inexplicably broke over Tom almost as suddenly as it came. Within a year or so, Buck had gone on to call for Prior’s resignation from the ERLC because of her steady track record working for the other side (by that, I mean the devil).

To this day I believe that Prior cast an actual spell on Tom Buck, and for a time, melded his mind beyond all reason. On August 2, 2018, I told Buck via text that I fervently believe Prior is “an honest-to-goodness witch.” He asked to speak in person to hear me make that case, and ultimately agreed that it was at least a possibility (to be fair to Tom, he might have just agreed to consider it to placate me, I do not know).

But Tom Buck is not the only person who has been inexplicably mind-melded by Prior, as though she casts spells upon them. I stood slack-jawed in disbelief, watching James White’s daughter and Sheologians gals be completely taken in by personal interactions with her.

Again, this woman has the personality of a Roomba and the personal charisma of fetid corpse. There is something about her voice, when directly at an individual one-on-one, that is apparently mesmering in a way that does not compute to photographs or voice recordings.

My suspicion that Prior is a witch is so strong that I begged Seth Dunn not to meet her in person for dinner, and if so, to not look her in the eyes. I’m pleased to say that Dunn made it through dinner without being mind-melded, but I was genuinely concerned it was a possibility.

Finally, I have shared my belief that Prior is a witch with some of the most notable names in evangelicalism, who have all either concurred and also had the thought, or at least thought it plausible.

IF I’M WRONG, AND SHE’S NOT A WITCH, SHE’S STILL NOT A CHRISTIAN

The concern with this kind of candidness, from some, is that if I am wrong – and Karen Swallow Prior is not a witch – that I have slandered a Christian sister. This, of course, is not my concern at all.

Even the most basic princples of discernment, such as “walks like a duck, talks like a duck, ” exempt Prior from the accusation of being a genuine believer in Jesus. While she can point to her position at a Southern Baptist Seminary (she frequented Episcopal Churches before taking that job) to establish her orthodoxy, discerners know that employment in such an institution is no bulwark against heresy and no guarantee that she believes what she professes.

Given her support for homosexuality, her support for abortion doctors, her support for female clergy, her support for animal rights, and her support for Social Religion, anyone calling Prior a “Christian” is guilty of slander against Jesus.

We have long breached the line in evangelicalism where we could consider those dabbling with Social Religion to be fellow Christians. We are far removed from those days when it was not clear that the religion being promoted by The Gospel Coalition, the ERLC, and Southern Baptist seminaries could be considered the religion of Christ. What they are propagating – and with Karen Swallow Prior as an integral part to their propagation – is an altogether different religion.

Whether Karen Swallow Prior is just a subversive ideologue who is intentionally weaving herself into evangelicalism to drag it to the left, or if she’s an actual witch, I am not positive. But I lean toward witch, because it’s the simplest answer and, therefore, the most likely. I remain unconvinced that a woman with her lack of personal credentials could hex a large swath of evangelical leadership without supernatural assistance from the devil.



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13 thoughts on “I also think Karen Swallow Prior is a Witch – But a Real One

  1. Walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, BUT, does she weigh the same as a duck? I can think of a scale I’d recommend to use…

  2. LOL. This is, unquestionably, the most delightful piece of writing I have read in months and serves as a pointed reminder to never, ever piss off JD 🙂

  3. You know, Matthew 18:15-17 has steps on how to deal with possible sin in the Church, and it definitely isn’t “come out of left field accusing someone of a capital sin”. Regardless of the sin, you should probably converse with the lady herself to establish the problem first, but Witchcraftery isn’t just “pride” or even “heresy”, it’s a full-blown capital sin, which makes this… weird… accusation worse. It’s like writing an article titled “I think John Macarthur is a serial killer” or “I think Doug Wilson cheated on his wife” (using these two biblical and Godly men as hypotheticals — they’re the few people I think you like, so I specifically went with them to highlight the issue at hand, God forbid I actually accuse them) without any evidence; or rather, if the evidence was “I saw Doug Wilson violate the Billy Graham rule for seven seconds by getting into an elevator with a younger woman for two floors”. Technically there “is” evidence, just stretched six miles wide, thin enough for donut frosting, and having 4 digits worth of alternative explanations. Sorry, but “that woman is (subjectively) unattractive yet (subjectively) persuasive, therefore she is a witch” probably wouldn’t have resulted in a stoning in Ancient Israel; you’d need something more.

    My point is, this accusation is flimsy and even funny in context, yet incredibly serious in content (again, witchcraft is a capital-offense level sin), and is also thrown out with NO steps from Matthew 18:15-17, which means KSP likely does not even know there is a (relatively) influential article which has just described her as possessing the moral character of a Libyan slave-trader. I don’t feel comfortable with the idea ._.

    1. Did you en read the article? JD has a pretty long history with KSP. and Matthew 18 is about church discipline. I wasn’t aware she attended JD’s church.

  4. I do not know if KSP is a witch, but I do know that witchcraft is real.

    While a student years ago, I worked for a time as a courier. One stop I was required to make was at a New Age Shop. (After a while, I told my employer I could no longer in good conscience make that stop, and he made other arrangements.) In addition to the literature, music, and candles, they had bottles with potions, books of spells, and all manner of other paraphernalia for bewitching people. They were selling supplies for the practice of witchcraft. I was uncomfortable just being in the store. Years later, I found myself at a market in a city in Mexico while on a mission trip. The market sold similar potions, books of spells, and ingredients. The local missionary told me that in a certain area of this city, one out of every eight female residents was a practicing witch.

    Our fictional notions from “The Wizard of Oz” or “Bewitched” notwithstanding, sorcery is not only a reality in the Bible. It is a reality in our world today. This doesn’t mean KSP is a witch. But it does mean that a person being a real witch in 2021 is certainly possible. The idea that someone could be a witch should not be scornfully dismissed.

  5. Excellent writing – though I believe the witch today is beyond one that is ‘fat and gothic’ – and one of the fruit is the practice of manipulation for means of control, which you have described plainly in this person.

  6. I went to LU and had friends who took her classes. They raved about her but I always personally felt darkness around her and avoided her. I think you are right.

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