Jen Hatmaker, the popular I’m-pretending-to-be-a-Christian-but-I’m-actually-a-pagan mommy-blogger and podcaster that is quickly climbing the ranks from “Gadfly False Teacher” to “Arch-Heretic,” has continued to out herself as a vessel of inhabitation for shifty-eyed swine who’d rather not go off a cliff, this time as she reflects on her spiritual transition from jewel to Jezebel.
Last time we caught up with her, she was celebrating homosexuality, being pro-transgender, becoming a woke racial justice warrior by saying, “the center of the church has failed to be black, gay, and transgender, and lamenting the death of notorious pro-abort Ruth Bader Ginsberg, giving her the benediction, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
On her August 3 For the Love podcast she endeavours to explain all the ways that she has changed in the last little while. While most of the commentary and self-reflective self-actualization she gives sounds like the sort of status updates you’d find posted on the Facebook wall of single moms whose grandparents have custody of their children but still caption every picture “my kids are my life,” she does offer us a few morsels, explaining that “from a wide-lens perspective, I would first want to talk about the process of flipping the script in my life spiritually, that is really the backdrop to my entire life, all of it.”
In this case, she discusses “what it meant to be a Christian in this world, what it means to be a woman, both inside a faith structure and out of it, and my understanding of God” and notes that “everything I really learned about God was from that angle, everything was on a foundation of fear. So I was definitely afraid of God.”
She was a pastor’s wife for years, and it is so evident that her theology and way of thinking were fundamentally flawed and false to the core.
I was directly told and instructed my entire life, that the salvation of the world was our responsibility, essentially. That if we were not aggressive and assertive evangelists constantly, basically that people’s blood was on our hands, you know?
That we had some secret that for some reason I couldn’t figure out, we had been granted. It was ours to tell everybody, and if we didn’t, we would answer for it one day. So there’s even this thing like all along, which was ‘Oh someday you’ll stand in front of God, and even then, even there, he’ll be disappointed in you.’
Like if somehow you make it through the gates, God is gonna sit there and recite to you all the things you missed, all the things you got wrong, all the chances you squandered. And all your failures, and then reluctantly, God, he would let us in, because he had to, because Jesus. Right? Because Jesus somehow made it okay, and so God had to finally let in these wayward kids that he can barely stand. That’s how it felt.
Turning to the role of women, she recounts how she started “having a cognitive dissonance” because “the God that I understood seemed to very keen on keeping white men in charge, in keeping women and girls down and shamed and blamed in protecting hierarchy.”
This happened in her early thirties, she guesses between the age of 30-33 when “new ideas came in’ and she had a “cognitive dissonance that didn’t fit into her template.” (She is 46 years old now.)
I was definitely scared of authority, which of course, in my environment were men, only. White men. They were in charge because ‘God.’ They were in charge because ‘God.’ They were in charge because ‘Bible.’ They were the head. And the rest of us were just, like, secondary supporting cast, all the women and kids. I never saw a woman in leadership, I’m getting ahead of myself. This is what it means to be a woman. Okay,
They could be an aerospace engineer. They can be CEOs of their companies, but they could not preach. That is where their limits hit the wall, which I just accepted, by the way, I just accepted that is, I don’t know if this is how they understand it, they must be right, they’d never get this something this important wrong. I mean, they would never keep half of us, subjugated erroneously, right? They would never get—this wouldn’t be a power play. Wouldn’t be for position. I guess they just got it right. And that’s our lot in life.
Having broken free of that subjugation, she concludes by noting that her newfound belief system allows for her to have a “mysterious faith” where she doesn’t need to have all the answers or believe the narratives she was taught. She remarks that “questions or even dissent were couched as a lack of faith or a lack of obedience or ultimately heresy. That’s the favorite word people like to call me; a heretic.” And then celebrates her own invented notions of God and the scriptures by bashing anyone believing otherwise. [What? We are the heretics? -Ed.]
How could we have formulated God down to all these lists and templates? It’s just silly. So knowing that God was allowed to remain mysterious to me, in some ways, was a big relief, that I could not have to use my mind to find some sort of script to make God fit the narrative I was handed.
Does that make sense? I don’t have to do that anymore. I didn’t have to figure out how to get from A to B to C in a way that created less dissonance for me. I could just say, ‘I don’t know how that works. I don’t know why that happened. I don’t know what God thinks about that. I don’t know how this works out in the end. I don’t know what eternity really looks like. I don’t know—Well, a huge relief.
And then to deeply discover that God has always been unambiguously on the side of the oppressed. And that injustice matters to him and that his beautiful world that he imagined, that He sent Jesus to teach us about is like a paradise, honestly, where everyone is safe. Everyone is cherished. Everyone is deeply Beloved, they are well cared for, they’re connected, no one is alone.
No one is going hungry or going without because we share. There are no manmade hierarchies that keep certain people on top, and others on bottom, simply by virtue of gender, or skin colour, or sexual orientation, or nationality. That’s just not real, that’s invented. That’s invented. What a relief!
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