Steve Lawson Breaks His Silence: ‘I have Sinned Grievously Against the Lord, Against my Wife, my Family’
Six months after being removed from “all ministry activities” by Trinity Bible Church in Dallas, Steve Lawson has released a public statement concerning the “sinful relationship with a woman not my wife” (his words) that led to his removal, confirming earlier reporting. The statement follows months of calls for a public statement of some kind and confirms the reporting Protestia and others have provided since the scandal broke.
In the statement, Lawson claims repentance for his sin and indicates that he is under the shepherding of two pastors, the elders of a local congregation, and an “accountability team” to counsel him concerning “the decisions [he has] to make. Lawson indicates he is “involved in the life of the church” he is attending, including regular attendance and participating in the Lord’s supper during what he is describing as a “recovery season.”
Notably, Lawson’s letter does not discuss disqualification from future vocational/pastoral ministry, nor does it discuss how his ongoing “recovery season” and participation with another church squares with the claims that he was an actual church member of Trinity Bible Church as was claimed by some but specifically refuted by Protesia.
He writes in full:
It is with a shattered heart that I write this letter. I have sinned grievously against the Lord, against my wife, my family, and against countless numbers of you by having a sinful relationship with a woman not my wife. I am deeply broken that I have betrayed and deceived my wife, devastated my children, brought shame to the name of Christ, reproach upon His church, and harm to many ministries.
You may wonder why I have been silent and largely invisible since the news of my sin became known. I have needed the time to search my own soul to determine that my repentance is real.
I alone am responsible for my sin. I have confessed my sin to the Lord, to my wife, and my family, and have repented of it. I have spent the past months searching my heart to discover the roots of my sin and mortifying them by the grace of God. I hate my sin, weep over my sin, and have turned from it.
My sin carries enormous consequences, and I will be living with those for the rest of my life. Over the years, many have looked to me for spiritual guidance, and I have failed you. I beg for your forgiveness.
I have been undergoing extensive counseling for the last five months to face the hard questions I need to address. I have dealt with sin issues that have been painfully exposed in my heart. I have submitted myself in weekly accountability to two pastors and to the elders of a local congregation, who have shepherded my soul. I am also under the oversight of an accountability team who monitor my progress and give me wise counsel in the decisions I have to make.
I am growing in grace, reading and absorbing the Word of God, putting it into practice, praying, and meeting with other believers. I am involved in the life of the church, attending and participating in prayer meetings, Sunday school, the worship service, and taking communion weekly. I am being fed the Word in the mid-week Bible study. Please pray for my spiritual growth into Christlikeness as I follow Him moment by moment during this recovery season.
I am grateful for the unmerited grace of God in the gospel to extend His full forgiveness to me. Again, I ask for your forgiveness as well.
While I continue to do the hard work of soul-searching repentance, I do not intend to make further public comments for the foreseeable future.
Please pray for the Lord’s mercy and grace as I seek to make right the deeply wrong sins I have committed against my wife and family, and that in His time and way He will bring about redemption and restoration in our marriage, for His glory.
Steven Lawson
About Author
Did he reject the false gospel of Calvinism that made him believe he was predestined to do this sin yet?
Oh shut up, plenty of Arminians commit the same sin
73 year old pastors? I doubt it. Steve Lawson did it because he believed God predestined it. Not because he was a hormone raging 20 year old.
You really sound foolish and despicable. I’m sure you don’t think you are but you are a divisive person the Bible warns of.
Again with the “repentance from sin” nonsense. There is no such thing in the Bible. Ask forgiveness for your sins, yes. But “repentance” is from unbelief to belief in Christ, and that is done once. “Doing penance” for your sins is Catholicism.
Steven Andersnake only taught you that because he likes beating his wife (alledgedly).
2 Corinthians 7:9 King James Version
“9 Now I rejoice, not that ye were made sorry, but that ye sorrowed to repentance: for ye were made sorry after a godly manner, that ye might receive damage by us in nothing.”
Paul is writing about making them repent of allowing a man sleeping with his father’s wife to get away with it in their church, not that they needed to repent of not believing in Jesus.
You and Steven Andersnake would I guess just let a man seep with his father’s wife because repentance from sins is a heresy to the hellbound heretics who want to go to hell.
He sure knows all the right things to say. Of course he does, he was a theological teacher for years. He knows exactly what a truly repentant man should say. He has been in this relationship for a long time. He needs to be out of public service of any kind for a long time, in order to test his repentance. I know. I was there. When caught, almost every adulterer lies for months or even years and covers up more sin than they confess. It takes a long time for all of the truth to come out. I woudl not trust him to lead in prayer for a year. He needs strict accountability and a willnigness to allow someone access to everything of his, phone, email, time, everything with no limitations, at first. It takes a long time for someone who has been hiding their sin for this long to really “get right with God,” so to speak.
Has Pastor Steven Lawson asked forgiveness of the father whose daughter Pastor Lawson defiled? Has Pastor Steven Lawson asked forgiveness of the young woman who was a student at the college over which he had spiritual oversight, having choosen to perpetuate his lust for her instead of doing his job of protecting her from defilement? Has Pastor Lawson asked all theur family members, now marred by publicity, for forguveness? Did Pastor Lawson forget that he was supposed to be a spiritual leader who was even “getting paid” for it, too? Has Pastor Lawson also been asked to refund all of the salary that he received “to represent spiritual leadership” since the first day of his affair?
Jeez, you’re really harsh.
You have no words for the woman who sinned against Steve’s wife and children? Who sinned alongside of Steve? Both were guilty but you seem to give a pass to one.
When I read Dr Lawson’s social media post, my warning alarm bells ring “warning” more than compassion – even though I want to have compassion on him. You see, the entire post strikes me as being a manufactured response for the gullible public and more of a PR exercise rather than something genuine (to my mind – and yes, I can hear the Dr Lawson fanboys coming toward me to accuse me of judgmentalism); but for me, as with certain things in life, there are always a few tacit markers that serve as my indicia.
See, first off, a true repentant posture would have been forthcoming months earlier- possibly within the first week or month at most (cf. Psalm 51 and David’s instant posture of admission to Nathan – albeit his hiding it for 9 months or more, yes- David lived in sin and unrepentance for almost a year, but following being confronted, his repentance was actually instant- there was no delay upon being convicted and begging for the Lord to blot out his sin and to not take His Holy Spirit away from him).
Secondly, for me, a true repentance would have involved taking full ownership and responsibility by the conduct of actual actions; not merely writing out mere words that declare to the public that you will or intend to take full ownership as Dr Lawson is doing here. This would have been further demonstrated by actually dealing with and naming out the issues and admitting to them charge by charge. Instead, what you get with this social media post (the fori of choice here is also telling; because it is not even a formal or open letter to the elders and or leaders of either TMS or the church he was preaching at – since he wasn’t even a member of either), and the whole curmudgeon results in this very carefully worded piece (with help from his lawyers no doubt; counsellors et al). This doubtlessly means his confession (ostensibly) rings hollow and contains many holes because he never addressed that root of the problem that went public at its core. He never once addressed facts that emerged that his relationship with the woman in her 20s was a sexual one not a companionship one; that it went on for five or more years (as Phil Johnson and the TMS leaders came to learn); let alone facts that later emerged that showed it was her parents being the one to bring the charge to Lawson’s elders in the first place; and it was his firm denying of all the accusations that caused the very concomitant delays in the justice process because of Lawson’s repeated denials for the first month. Dr Lawson never even addressed that he refused to admit to it until he was exposed by a combination of the girl’s father bringing the charges to the elders- who tried to “handle” it internally originally (until it got out/was ‘leaked’ to the media).
Even more shocking is that Dr Lawson never once explains how he managed to “preach past his conscience” for years and years- because surely he did not just fall into a casual fling overnight- this was a pattern of behaviour that was well rehearsed and covered for – with budgetary allocations of ministry money to cover the sin. He’d have alibis and it’s also telling he doesn’t mention his wife and whether he reconciled with her and his family. All of this is omitted very carefully from Dr Lawson’s post. Now, there is a fine line between being discerning and risking being a judge who declares a person is lost in the affirmative as a false teacher or a gone case. We must be careful not to judge and condemn him here. Nevertheless, if you ask me, this man’s status as a true believer is something the gullible sheep need to leave to the Lord (without judging), but that surely cannot mean we are foolish to omit the need to discern and protect ourselves/yourself as the body of Christ must do- for we are to discern and assess everything against the Word. So, whilst he is not attempting to pretend like he is suddenly re-qualified from ministry (because he surely is permanently disqualified), I suppose the final nail in the coffin is that he didn’t even care to mention or at the least, iterate, that he is now indeed disqualified (which should be a statement that he utters from his repentant heart having had such godly sorrow for the shame he has cast on the ministry and name of Christ), and the least he should do is publicly declare that he is not seeking to return to any form of ministry, not least his gravy train (since he was earning 6 figures from ministry love gifts, book deals, publishing and endorsements, and a lavish lifestyle of hotels and jets and travelling extensively- from which he fell into the temptation traps of constant travel and such an affair to begin with). In conclusion, if I hadn’t said it enough, I’d advise caution! Now to be fair and clear, I am not one of those that thinks all his past sermons and books should be thrown out- since he did preach the gospel and truth to some degrees (seeing especially that part of the very disguise in the veneer here is he managed to be so doctrinally astute and “sound” that most people could not discern his character due to the cover of doctrine without the praxis and actual life of holiness lived out)- but nevertheless, there should be caution in dealing with such a one.
One does not just camp (or ascend/climb up the “ranks”) in the Reformed and Conservative circles and rise to such a position but live such a double life for years and years and then just whoopsie do, suddenly, fall into such a heinous sin by “accident” at the age of 60 plus or 70 plus- where you ought to be sinning less and less due to a life of progressive sanctification (even if positionally justified and sanctified from a theological absolute); it beggars belief that someone can pull a 5 year stunt like this on a falling just down to the wretched fallen flesh that means it is part of the residual sin in us that we carry; instead, we have to understand that we cannot possibly exclude from evidentiary assessment the very pathology of who we potentially might be dealing with here as well. As such, there must be extreme caution in dealing with such a one, even as yes, absolutely, we are all sinners needing grace alone, and we are all saved by Christ alone and not works or how well we live or how perfect we seem to be. Absolutely, it is about grace and forgiveness yes, and certainly we welcome him back into the body of Christ by grace, as we all fall short and have sinned and live in Romans 7 and face struggles with our sinful flesh.
However, because of the nature of this particular case, you need to exercise caution and discernment alongside grace; precisely because the testimony and credibility of the person is itself difficult to ascertain; even whilst we want to not judge and be kind and merciful and quick to forgive. It should be the elders and leaders closest to him that make the determination on that. My issue is that when someone goes on social media to begin with and doesn’t start with an open letter apology to his previous church and TMS and to Dr MacArthur and so many others, my warning alarm bells ring “warning” more than compassion (and believe me, I want to – with all my heart- extend compassion and love to such a one as I am a sinner like anyone else too).
Just adding on to what I wrote yesterday – and I note what 4Given1 below has submitted – I have reflected and perhaps I have been too close to the line when it comes to exercising judgment/discernment but not sinning; and also using too many words wherein is much sin. I am sorry to the Lord as well as to you brothers and sisters for these sins and humbly seek your forgiveness. I also noticed a few typos and errors in there as follows:
1a) I wrote incorrectly “gullible sheep” in the line “this man’s status as a true believer is something the gullible sheep need to leave to the Lord (without judging)”….which is condescending towards fellow brothers and sisters; as if I was above and higher. I’m sorry about that. I also insulted the Lord Jesus by suggesting only the gullible sheep need to trust the Lord to be the judge of our hearts. This is theologically incorrect and was not deliberate- I did not set out to phrase it as an attack on Christ. All of us are sheep and I should not have condescended all brethren (fellow believers) and suggested I am above the hoi polloi. I sincerely meant to and mean to say that we all need to leave the judging of this case to the Lord.
1b) I wrote that in this case, we should have grace but with discernment. The truth be told, you have to go all the way with grace. I acknowledge what 4Given1 has written below, as it convicted me that yes, indeed, I risk being a judaiser-legalistic phariseeical type by mixing grace with something else, when grace should be undiluted. We need to forgive and without keeping count as 4Given1 says below. So, absolutely, I’m sorry brothers and sisters, I absolutely wish to say I agree – I should have said, let’s just go with grace and forgiveness and stand with that.
2) I wrote incorrectly that Dr Lawson did not mention his wife and family in his post. He actually did. I’m sorry Dr Lawson for wrongly saying that about you. Nevertheless, I stand by my point – that the letter was worded very carefully, to avoid allowing the general public to know whether his wife and him are reconciled- I suspect not from the inference that he will have to get help in that area and his statement does state he trusts the Lord to heal his marriage in that regard. Again, sorry for judging you Dr Lawson.
3) I was confusing in my phrasing and language when I wrote: “it beggars belief that someone can pull a 5 year stunt like this on a falling just down to the wretched fallen flesh that means it is part of the residual sin in us that we carry; instead, we have to understand that we cannot possibly exclude from evidentiary assessment the very pathology of who we potentially might be dealing with here as well.” This sentence is just grammatically incorrect- I meant to word it like this (sorry I typed out the above in a half hour period whilst at my office desk- my sin again- I should have been working!): “it beggars belief that someone can pull a 5 year stunt like this and lay the blame for that squarely on a momentary lapse/falling and put that simply just down to a believer still dwelling in a body of wretched fallen flesh (that means our struggle against the residual sin in us that we carry) as if that justifies a 5 year stunt like this.” I apologise for not wording it better. My point is that Dr Lawson could not possibly, based on the facts, have simply cheated on his wife just in a momentary lapse at the tail end of his career; bear in mind- he was caught. He did not voluntarily come to an admission or self surrender in this case. That he could have done what he did indicates at the very least, his problem and infidelity to his wife began much earlier with the mind and heart, long before the commencement of this 5 year affair.
4) Now, what I’m going to say next may seem odd given the repentant stand I have taken above; but the thing is- whilst I am all for full forgiveness and not keeping count, and for being quick to forgive, the problem with Dr Lawson’s case is one of threshold. Does Dr Lawson’s confession even pass the threshold of what constitutes a true repentance? I think not. Again, I risk being fully judgmental here and crossing that line, but here’s the thing- I would be quick to forgive if he had actually properly repented.
As such, to my mind, the huge elephant in the room, the chief conundrum and problem with this case (I’m an Australian lawyer in case people are wondering why I refer to this affair as a matter/case) and Dr Lawson’s attempt at posting a social media format for an apology to demonstrate repentance, and why I think it is right that I wrote what I wrote above (besides the errors I have corrected), is that in my view, Dr Lawson also never actually addressed or confessed to the allegations at all- did he?
Think about it- he has left everything in ambiguity and vagueness. The general public then have varying degrees of factual matrices in relation to what they know. A true repentance would have involved Dr Lawson coming clean. Other facts he did not admit to nor say sorry for include the fact that Elder Phil Johnson said very clearly in September October last year 2024, that this was not a “noble confession”; yet you have folks who support Dr Lawson trying to redact retrospectively the narrative to suggest he had admitted to everything and came clean. Dr Lawson never came clean about the other fact that this young lady in question was a TMS or TMU alumnus, and was a student at the time when he was a high ranking theological Professor/Lecturer/Faculty member at the time; and that she had already known him since she was a little girl as he was friends of her parents. Even millenials today know that dating their peers’ daughter is considered not only taboo; but downright unacceptable. TMU accounts from students and watchers and whistleblowers from within have also given evidence stating that the girl in question was seen adjusting Dr Lawson’s tie, combing her hands through his hair before he went out to preach on occasions (seen by behind the scenes staff before he went out in front of the pulpit and cameras). This is not mere inadmissible hearsay; this is evidence given by whistleblowers within TMU/TMS.
Again, these were also never addressed. That Dr Lawson thinks it is fine to omit the admission of guilt whilst confessing in a generic and vague sense to give the vestige of a Psalm 51 confession (which if you go online you will see everyone from Spencer Smith to The Reddit Community giving approval to), is to my mind, sorely insufficient. It’s like saying sorry publicly but never owning what you did by listing the crimes and confessing up first. What then exactly are you saying sorry about Dr Lawson? What kind of confession is confession that does not admit to the details? This is the chief problem in this case.
You see, if the girl who went on to become his “girlfriend” for 5 years or more was a mere child when her parents were already friends of his, and given he knew their family, the sheer fact that he would go on to have a sexual relationship with this girl (albeit when she was now in her 20s) is still hugely problematic if not for and in other senses, then, at the very least in this one sense: and I come back to what Dr MacArthur said in his Q&A on Steve Lawson in November 2024- how could Steve Lawson be able to mask this for so long and “preach past his conscience” for year after year for five whole years at ShepCon, from the pulpit? Anyone who has preached before knows what 4Given1 shared below- that it is better that not many of us be teachers as we face higher judgment. The fact that he could have even considered letting this child become his girl and having sex with her is just beyond the pale- it is not only unacceptable, there are elements of alleged grooming involved as well; not to mention the conscience being so seared that he can actually spit out sermon after sermon each week whilst engaging in this. Notice as well that from Phil Johnson’s testimony of October 2024, that Dr Lawson and the girl both denied any “literal fornication” in September (this is the 1 month denial of any wrongdoing thing I highlighted in yesterday’s post), and yet, some like Clint Archer, or Rev Jesse Jackson (all TMU alumnus) were led to believe by Lawson and his team that he only apparently slept with her in the last part of the five year relationship. Do you see what this shows- do you see what is going on here? In September, Dr Lawson was capable of denying “literal fornication” in Sept 24, and yet in his private counselling sessions and sessions with Pastors and old friends in the months ensuing, he now says he only fornicated with her toward the end. This is what I meant when I said it shows you the kind of person we cannot rule out by way of evidentiary assessment – the pathology of his modus operandi. It simply cannot be ruled out.
Look, I am a wicked sinner myself, a lawyer who has lied and is a sinner saved by grace. I am not trying to go against Dr Lawson just for the sake of it. I am saying all these to reiterate my point from yesterday: I’m not buying it, and it isn’t because I am not wanting to be quick to forgive, it is because it is important to be discerning because this case has too many complexities and a facts matrix that doesn’t add up based on the confession to date; and this is why I question the validity of his repentance and if it is true. I stand by all I have written.
My friend, you said you were not keeping count and then you immediately went back on that. God knows if Steve is repentant. I believe he is disqualified permanently from authority in the church. He made shipwreck of his life and scorched so many others but it is not ours to judge if he’s sincere. There’s only one judge. Pray for him and all involved and let’s see what the Lord will do.
Sincerity is not the issue now- the confession and a full admission to the prescribed set of facts (and any number of other new facts that have been hidden or masked or failed to be declared) is. That’s the issue for the threshold I am referring to. Read what I wrote again- I did not go back on anything- I was reminding everyone of the importance of the need (in this case scenario) for and in keeping with a true repentance, then a full orbed accounting has to be done- given the public nature of this scandal. It was public and the accounting has to be made public – assuming he wants to do a proper apology. You can only go into the forgiveness and allowing it to be wiped away, and for that matter, start a discussion on “not keeping count” after the admission and confession. It is only after full admission of guilt, then the forgiveness can kick in. I am trying to say that the questioning of the validity and testimony of Dr Lawson on the basis that the confession to the prescribed full set of facts was not made is still the issue at hand; an elephant in the room that has been left unaddressed. That is not judgmentalism (though I can see why you and many others would take it in that way due to an initial read)- it is the calling for a full accounting first before we can even get to that stage. But you are also not entirely wrong dear Jon, and neither am I – hence I made proviso to say that he and his team are not answerable (obviously) to me and other people connected Dr MacArthur’s ministry worldwide, or to any of us for that matter- I said that this will be something for his team of elders and accountability people to address.
amen
Concerning this exchange, any such discussion must be preceded by self-examination II Cor 13:5, as it is revealing of the perceptions of Dr. Lawson, nothing more nor less, to wit:
Iron sharpens iron; so one man sharpens another. Prov 27:17
All things work together for good for the elect Rom 8:28
You shall know them by their fruit Matt 7:20
Practicing righteousness, practicing sin I John 3:7-10
Seek not to be teachers, James 3:1
Seek humility, pray for others, and repent II Chron 7:14
Repent and turn back Ezek 33:11; Acts 3:19
Forgive without keeping count Matt 18:22
Only God knows I Kings 8:39
Judging not unto sin John 8:7
Speaking too many words Prov 10:19
My exhortation to each confessing believer who has interest in Dr. Lawson, whether from flesh or Spirit, is pray without ceasing, and thereby be a servant to all, including those among us whose fall – even from the pulpit – is of great impact within the bride of Christ.
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