Op-Ed: Should You Attend the Wedding of a Man Sleeping With His Father’s Wife?

Last year during a Truth for Life program, Alistair Begg offered a scenario where a Christian woman called in saying that her grandson is about to marry a ‘transgendered person’ and wanted to know if she should attend the wedding.

Noting that “people may not like this answer,” Begg explained that as long as her grandson knows that she believes it is sinful and she does not agree with it, then she SHOULD attend the ceremony, and even buy them a gift, because if not, her absence will simply reinforce the fact that she is “judgmental” and “critical.”

While Begg was excoriated for the advice he stuck to his guns, including in a recent video for the Expositor’s collective. Given his dedication, we wonder what happens when you substitute another sexually sinful relationship in the place of the one he posited?

Does the advice still hold up with the grandmother attending the wedding of a father marrying his own daughter, or a brother marrying his own sister?

In the spirit of seeking to give a “compassionate” answer, what possible reason would Begg have to balk at advising someone to attend these weddings and bring them gifts, but not the transgender couple? These two scenarios at least have the right genders, and seem perfectly reasonable parallels to the grandmother’s dilemma.

But there is also a biblical reference we could substitute for, found in 1 Corinthians 5:

Suppose that man wants to take it to the next level and put a ring on it. Let’s review his original comments and then his updated commentary from earlier this week, with the only changes being the addition of this new scenario, seen in the bold text, to see what sort of advice Begg would likely give first century church congregants who know this man and his father’s wife, and don’t want to be seen as “judgmental” or “critical” by refusing to attend their wedding.

Here’s how Begg shared the story on the Expositor’s Collective. Again, changes in bold.

And so I phoned her up. And in the conversation on the phone, that’s how it went. She said, ‘you know, they’re going to get married. What do I do?’ I said, well, you got to talk to your husband. You got to think it out. And then I said to her, does your son know your views?

‘Oh yes’, she says ‘he knows’. Does he know that you’re opposed to his lifestyle because of what the Bible says? ‘Oh yes, he knows that too.’

And so I said, he obviously assumes that whatever this event is that there’s going to take place, he would assume on the strength of that, that you would not be present. She said, ‘yeah, that’s right’. I said, so the only way that you could disavow him of that notion would be to be present.

I said, because if he knows that you’re opposed to that and you show up, he’s not going to say, ‘oh, my grandmother came because she has changed her view.’ He’s going to say, ‘my grandmother came because she loves me.’

I said, you’ve got to figure that stuff out for yourself. I’m just saying..I said, you know, I’d go. I think I’d go. I think I’d go. And maybe I’d take him a gift. That was it. OK.

While Begg believes he would attend the wedding and bring them a gift, it’s difficult to imagine the Apostle Paul co-signing his decision.

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