Woke Church’s Storytime About Noah and the Flood Is About As Bad As You’d Expect

Pilgrim Congregational Church in Duluth, MN, is about as compromised as they come. Led by the excretable ‘Impastor’ Rev. Dr. Carla Jean Bailey, this ‘church’ exemplifies what it means to be a United Church of Christ congregation. Consisting entirely of senior citizens subdivided into weak-willed women and effete men, this extravagantly pro-choice, pro-LGBTQ goat pen will be gone in a decade or two, as they are wholly irrelevant and their only impact on the Kingdom of God is to draw people away from it.

During a recent service Interfaith Pride Celebration, which included congregants and ‘pastors’ from other nearby UCC churches and they still couldn’t fill the room, the Rev Bailey led the church through a read-and-response call to worship, which had the bastardized phrase “We praise God, for we are queer-fully and wonderfully made.”

She also laments that the church condemns trans and ‘2-spirited’ identities and then recounts the story of Noah and the flood to some children who hadn’t heard it before, and her version is about as bad as one could expect. 

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4 thoughts on “Woke Church’s Storytime About Noah and the Flood Is About As Bad As You’d Expect

  1. If Satan ran a counterfeit Christian church it would look and sound exactly like this.
    I pray for the naive and undiscerning congregation ignorantly following this deluded and morally and intellectually retarded woman into Hell.

  2. “The time will come when people won’t put up with true teaching. Instead, they will try to satisfy their own longings. They will gather a large number of teachers around them. The teachers will say what the people want to hear. ” (2 Tim 4:3 NIRV)

    “But there were also false prophets among the people, just as there will be false teachers among you. They will secretly introduce destructive heresies, even denying the sovereign Lord who bought them—bringing swift destruction on themselves. Many will follow their depraved conduct and will bring the way of truth into disrepute. In their greed these teachers will exploit you with fabricated stories. Their condemnation has long been hanging over them, and their destruction has not been sleeping. But these people blaspheme in matters they do not understand. They are like unreasoning animals, creatures of instinct, born only to be caught and destroyed, and like animals they too will perish.
    They will be paid back with harm for the harm they have done. Their idea of pleasure is to carouse in broad daylight. They are blots and blemishes, reveling in their pleasures while they feast with you. With eyes full of adultery, they never stop sinning; they seduce the unstable; they are experts in greed—an accursed brood! They have left the straight way and wandered off to follow the way of Balaam son of Bezer, who loved the wages of wickedness. It would have been better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than to have known it and then to turn their backs on the sacred command that was passed on to them. Of them the proverbs are true: “A dog returns to its vomit,” and, “A sow that is washed returns to her wallowing in the mud.” (2 Pet 2:1-3;12-15;21-22)

  3. Matthew 18:6 King James Version (KJV)

    “But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.”

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